June Weddings

June is a very popular month for weddings. I guess you could blame it on the Romans because they started the tradition. June weddings supposedly honor the Roman Goddess Juno. Juno was the Goddess of Marriage, fertility and wealth (not necessarily in that order).

My friend Harry (who is one of the wisest people I know) told me that weddings were held in June, not so much to honor Juno, but to insure that a new brides' pregnancy wouldn't be far enough along to prevent her from working during harvest. Harry's reasoning made sense to me; my fiancÚ's teaching contract didn't expire until June and she'd get a bonus if she could stick it out till schools' end.

I proposed in November, I discovered that waiting until June seemed like forever. I tried to talk her into going to Reno and eloping. I manage to get her as far as Klamath Falls when she broke down in tears; "I don't want to go to some drive in chapel. I want a real wedding with my family and friends. I want brides maids and a real minister."

No man can argue with tears.

I remember our wedding well. It was held in Seaside Oregon and was it ever a big deal.

I remember the wedding rehearsal. I was so filled with joy that I couldn't stay serious. The minister appeared to be very nervous.
I tried to counsel him "Charlie, don't worry, no matter what happens, we'll still manage to get married."

I don't think I was able to instill much in the way of confidence, but on the next day the wedding went off without a hitch.

We had a matron of honor, bride's maids, junior brides maids, tuxedoed ushers, a flower girl and a ring bearer. We had two ministers (one of which was my fiancÚ's father). There were more people than I thought could fit into the church. In addition to my wife's folks we had an Opera singer, a Disney TV Star, a former Miss Oregon and a soon to be Miss Utah. It was a big deal.
Most of the people were friends of the bride; all I had were a half dozen people from my family, as well as some people from my work, my old Air Force unit and college friends. The churchwomen and my wife's teacher friends did all of the catering and they had loads of food.

The wedding was beautiful. Everything went well. We exchanged rings and kissed, signed papers, paid the minister and did what was required of us.
My fiancÚ and I had agreed to have the wedding early in the afternoon. This way, we could be on our way before it got too late or too dark.
We knew that we were expected to be at the reception, and I was hungry.

"You can't eat yet. You and the wedding party have to pose for pictures." Said the photographer.


We posed, and then the bride's mother grabbed me. "You can't leave before Claudia opens her presents."


We opened presents, and I still didn't get anything to eat.

Someone slipped my new wife a salad, and she took a few bites.
The day dragged on and finally all the presents were opened and catalogued and we were on our way. It was starting to get dark.

I was loaned my wife's grand father's car. Her family thought that my car was too old. I wasn't about to make waves; I just wanted to get on my way.
We got partway out of town when our front tire went flat. I replaced the tire, then as we drove further discovered one of the headlights was out. We managed to make it to Tillamook. We checked into a motel and grabbed a bite to eat. I was starved. The next morning my new wife appeared to be very ill. I honestly thought that she was going to die. I later found out that there was something wrong with the reception salad and everyone who ate it, got sick. 

My car troubles didn't end in Tillamook, several days later the muffler fell off, the radiator hose sprang a leak, I had a bad spark plug wire, the fan belt broke, a windshield wiper didn't work and the battery needed to be replaced. So much for my taking a better car.

June is a time for weddings and for some reason I may have displeased the goddess Juno with my flip attitude.

In truth, she must not have been too upset, this June we will celebrate our 45th wedding Anniversary.

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